On the overnight bus I met a fellow American who was doing his own visa run, as he was offered a teaching job in Thailand. You have to get a workers visa in which you can’t get applied in Thailand, so you have to leave the country and then upon reentry you present your workers visa and border control stamps it and makes it official. He told me I should join him on a trip to Vang Viene. The party scene blew my mind. During the day and early evening you’d kick back at “movie bars” where they would show pirated movies all day long. Or you could go to a “Friends” bar and follow the going ons of Ross & Rachel. Simpons bars, etc. If it was popular they had a dedicated bar.

I’m not a big drinker, though a lil bit of weed wasn’t out of my range. My new travel companion suggested we go to an opium den. I declined, as I told him I tried it in Thailand and it didn’t do anything for me. He said, “Then you didn’t do enough.” I assumed he was probably right because I just did one hit. I was on a paid hiking group and didn’t trust anyone enough to have my back in case there was trouble. But this guy seemed to know his business. So we went to the opium den. If you’ve ever seen an opium den in old movies, that’s exactly what they looked like. You’d lay down on a clean bamboo mat and some old Asian guy with white hair would bring a huge bamboo pipe to your mouth and he would grind some opium into the bowl and instructed you to breathe naturally. No holding the smoke in like it’s $800/oz weed. Just do the old in out.

After a few rounds another spot opened up so we each were tooting on the pipe side by side, 5 minutes at a time. I don’t remember how much it cost, except that it was cheap. But boy did I get fucked up. It’s hard to describe. If you’ve had opiates before though, it’s the original stuff. Had the best night of sleep in my life. Makes you constipated as hell though, so eat plenty of fruit and bread. And Laos is renowned for their French bread as I learned the next morning. How had I missed decent bread.

I returned again in 2009, but the opium dens were gone, or I didn’t know the right people to ask. And the town was a lot more chilled out, because the government wanted it that way. They would fuck with the locals and issue $300 tickets to foreigners. I’m not surprised they relaxed enough that it maintained its reputation because it brought in a lot of money. But what you saw in the late 2000s is but a shadow upon what I saw and experienced in 2001. A Good Time was had by all.